dishes, laundry---and poop.

i wish i could tell you i love my job.

i love my kids.

adore them in fact.

that is why i don't quit.

but i want to. 

many days i dream of doing something great.

maybe not even something great.

i just dream of doing something.

other than well mom stuff.

there are no thank yous with mom stuff.

no raises.

often what accompanies mom stuff is whining, crying, complaining...poop.

then there are the outsiders.

who believe you are living the dream.

or taking advantage of the dream.

who knows.

i've learned to shrug off the opinions of others.

knowing that the majority of those with their comments could in no way do this job.

so i internally smile at their silliness.

i'm slowly coming around.

realizing God has put me here.

lately i have been able to see this so clearly.

decisions i have once regretted.

He was in every one of them.

His purpose was to get me here.

in this exact place.

longing for more of Him.

God often comes to us in our "boring" days, veiled in the most ordinary of circumstances.  In fact, "ordinary" is often the disguise of the divine.   If we are constantly anticipating a grandiose event to accompany the times when we encounter Him or hear His voice, we will miss out on many intimate moments in our relationship with God.  The mundane, the routine, the commonplace--these are often the contexts in which He will reveal Himself to humanity.

Today's tasks---even the most mundane of them--are often preparation for tomorrow's calling.
 {Priscilla Shirer}

those moments when you see His grace.
the grace that has you on your knees.
eyeballs raining.
those moments are priceless.

the last words my mom spoke to me were---

"sis, you are a good mom"
you see, debbie knew her babies.
she knew i was not confident in my ability as a mother.
God knew this.
so He put me here.
and all along He was preparing me.
for His calling.
i am a mom.
to two beautiful babies.
and I have another on the way.
much like my other two.
i don't know boy or girl.
what he or she will look like.
but there is a seed.
it was not planted in my belly.
instead He placed it in my heart
and it is real.
i'm not sure how it will play out.
when our new littleLove will show up.
but i do know that God is good.
He works through the mundane, the routine, the commonplace.
dishes, laundry ---and poop.